all i can say is... wow.
now that i've given thought of it, i've always been hiding behind the shadows, not wanting to go out and spread the talent. confusing isnt it? :) the real thing is, im always forced to sing.well, not always. most of the time. i have this phobia that i might not satisfy the people i'll be singing in front of. im afraid of the criticisms they might throw at me. for, of course, my parents always wanted me to sing like a diva of some sort, making me sing endless ballads here and there when all i ever wanted to sing are different songs of different genres. of course, i really dont fancy singing dance songs or whatever you call them. it's just so plain boring. especially if you're just going to sway and feel like dancing when you're singing it. i prefer singing those kind of songs if it's choreographed with a few dancers at the back. haha.
going back, it's as if i always wanted to be out of the limelight. i was never the hey-i-can-sing type. i am never like that.
however, i love singing more than everything.
so i tried out for the local choir in our parish after a second invitation by my childhood friend. of course. it was waaaaaaaaaaaaaay different from the singing i have known since. it was hard. real hard. i have to use falsetto and head tone most of the time, andof course, i have to blend it. the placement and the techniques are one big contrast. and the effect is as well. in here, i felt happier. coz im not alone in the limelight. im always with people who could back me up. it was different. and it almost the one i was longing for.
however, that's not the case.
im really more into alternative and i just cant let go of that. i have to do something. im trying my best right now to balance the two. but its always as if one overshadows the other. there's no homeostasis. no yin yang. no equilibrium. no center of gravity.